Splinter Cell From Church Probably Not as Cool as Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell

Because the world is totally perfect right now and not everything ever is going completely to hell, some people are bored and are making up problems they don't even have to. From the NY Times:

WHEATON, ILL. — Conservatives disaffected from the Episcopal Church are expected to declare on Wednesday that they are founding their own rival Anglican province in North America, the biggest challenge yet to the authority of the church in a five-year battle over the ordination of an openly gay bishop.

Yay, this must be a signal that everything is going back to normal and it's time to start flipping beach condos again, because no one in their right mind would give two good god damns about some gay dude believing in fairy tales unless the world were perfect.

We guess this means that the credit crunch is over and banks are lending money to idiots again. Idiots like people who go to church and hate gayz. These idiots must not be worried about getting loans for their kids to go to college and turn into better people than they are, because, again, if that were even a possibility, devoting time and effort into caring about someone else's sex life wouldn't make any sense at all.

This is the only time in the history of the world that wacky-babble (religion) has been a sign of things getting better. ComedyandPolitics is thrilled with this new development.